Joy of joys. Not only does the mind of every kid we teach start shutting down about 2 weeks out, but the party season kicks into gear in earnest and the silly season of reports and letters home and reference writing and stuff to do for next year needs to be organized etc etc etc.
I’ve just written a great swag of reports today, so while we’re in report speak maybe one on us for the year might be in order….hey! what’s happening? This is just appearing from nowhere…hey!…………

“The Braggetts have had a fair year overall. I must temper my comments somewhat by the fact that I write this report on ‘The Braggetts’. One member of the family has had an excellent year and deserves praise for her continual quest for excellence in all she does. Casanda has taught without complaint all year and provided a professional service to her employers and ultimately, the students under her tutelage. She has maintained the highest of professional standards and has assisted colleagues, added intelligent and insightful comments whenever necessary and generally performed as a seasoned and consummate international educator. On the domestic front, she has again shouldered the bulk of the so called “home duties” without complaint and in a most chipper mood despite the vague and cumbersome attempts at “help” from the other human recipient of this report. The two cats, Virg and Mary, have been delightful companions, alternating between cute sculpture like pieces to be admired as they slept and the more energetically entertaining tumbling furballs, playfully wrestling and chasing objects and each other around the house.
It is with a heavy heart, however, that I report on David and his year. Seemingly not content to systematically ruin the department that he ‘leads’ in a most unprofessional manner at work, he has managed to alienate and offend an inordinate number of his colleagues in his day-to-day dealings with them. David appears to be a “do what I say”, not a “do as I do” type of worker. The shockingly unprofessional example that he sets, both to colleagues and students alike, has to be seen to be believed. He has the audacity to have a day off if he is sick and for some unfathomable reason, tends to state his opinion in all honesty if he is asked. David has failed miserably in the art of lick ass diplomacy so favoured by many of his colleagues, a failure which has cast him in a very bad light indeed. At home, he seems to believe that carrying a festering load of garbage to the truck down the road on too infrequent occasions and writing emails and blogs actually constitutes some kind of contribution to effective domestic living. One can only hope that in the next academic year, David will live up to his undoubted potential”

Oh, that’s a disgrace! That’s very unfair…who wrote that report? How did it get published on my blog? I must protest about this report! Who can I contact to complain?!

Photos today are of David sitting on the skeletal base of the bed in the cat’s room with Virg on my back, Virg on the blanket box and Mary on the mat looking out the door. The report’s “Miss Goody Two Shoes” doesn’t get a photo this week!

The annual tongue lashin’ extravaganza is on in earnest tonight, as the boys from the temple round the corner have donned their best temple T-shirts and bandannas and chewed a frightening amount of betel nut in order to do their very best work tonight. The drums are beating as I write and the crackers seem improbably close, seeming to burst just beyond our door. Virg and Mary are cowering wherever they can, the noise just too much for them to bear. Luckily this strange and cacophonous event takes place but once a year: the delirium of the betel nut boys just builds and builds till later in the night when some brave (or foolhardy) of their number lash their tongues with special forks, drawing blood and whirling like dervishes in their anesthetized dance. I hate to think how they feel tomorrow!

In the midst of this maelstrom of sights and sounds unusual, Ross and I had strapped our spare double mattress on top of the “Auburgino” and attempted to pilot it from our place to his. The tongue lashers had blocked nearly every street so we had to pull out all our wily skills from the years of living here to go down back lanes and one-way streets to get across the suburb successfully. Ross and Ains had been sleeping on an air mattress for a couple of nights so I said they’d be much better off with a real mattress: after all, they still have two and a half weeks!
Their apartment is stripped bare of nearly every piece of furniture, the shippers having removed the majority on Saturday. It must be a terribly strange sensation; still going to work each day as the year winds down and going home to an empty shell. At least now, they might sleep a little sounder!

I’ve been struck down by a most virulent “stomach bug” since Wednesday afternoon and have been virtually house bound. They’re great these euphemisms aren’t they? I suppose “shitting through the eye of a needle” doesn’t have quite the same ring! Anyway, I missed a number of farewell parties, but also a wedding we’d been invited to. Cass flew the Braggett flag and reported it to be a very strange event indeed. One of our Australian colleagues was marrying a Taiwanese woman (educated in the States, a fluent English speaker and a member of our faculty) and the ceremony and reception were quite a mix bizarre of Aussie and Taiwanese. Many dishes of suspicious origin were served and though many people tried their best, it was fare wasted on the western contingent present.

We’re just hanging in there at the moment…very keen to get home. Photos are all sorts of early tongue lashin’ stuff; the boys were just moving to the various staging grounds around the suburb at this point in the afternoon. Now, the fireworks are barking non-stop, gunpowder lingers in the air and the drums beat on…it’s going to be quite a long night!

This is belated due to a distinct lack of motivation. To be honest, not a lot has been happening except for a huge show on Saturday night to farewell Chad. We had a very relaxed weekend after Ross and I went out on Thursday and Friday afternoon to the surf.

We had mixed success in the latter part of the week at the surf. Carl joined us on Thursday, as he wouldn’t get a chance on the weekend because he was going to Hong Kong with the swimming team. We got a few small waves at the Pillbox and were once again fascinated by some young couples turning up to get their wedding photos taken. As you can see from the long shot featured here, the Pillbox (said Pillbox in the left foreground) is not a place of great beauty, but at dusk, some great shots can be taken with the water as a backdrop. You’ll notice the incredible amount of rocks at this our “secret” surfing spot. We’re hoping that even when the local boys discover this spot that the ugly rock formations might frighten them off. We’re sure the discovery will happen soon, as we’ve seen cars with boards lurking very close to our inbound lanes and alleys and there is an amazing building boom going on just behind the pig farm, which holds prime spot on the coast! We’ve had a number of years now since I first discovered it on the scooter on an expedition one day, so we hope it will last a little longer.
Friday was a millpond at the activity centre, but Ross and I got a few glassy barrels at the cliff at Jinshan number 2. Trouble was the tubes were only 6 inches big! Lots of fun though and it was good take off, duck and cover practice.

We gave Chad a great sendoff on Saturday night and more than a few men at school still had a sore head on Monday. We had loads of fun and managed to miss the big bus downtown when the driver left in a hissy fit (!), then caught the 2nd half of an exciting FA cup final at the Brass Monkey. I’ve started to collect money for the big Ross extravaganza planned for June 3rd and it is going well so far.

Of course, we watched the Knights in their great win on Sunday: got out of gaol there!

Photos: Mary stretches out under the table on the weekend, a close shot of some photographers with the happy couple, a long shot of the Pillbox and wedding photos.

Working on a Saturday?! Not our usual style but Cass and I both spent a whole day on Saturday, proctoring, invigilating, sorting and grading 124 admissions entrance tests (x4!). The school gets an increasingly large number of kids applying each semester and these kids need to be screened to assess what services they need. This traditionally lies within the auspices of the ESL department and I have done this myself on a school day in the past few years. It was moved to Saturday, with the promise of a day’s pay this year and after advertising the position in my department, no one came forward, so Cass thought she might as well do it, get the cash and buy something with it. I thought that was a great idea but as the numbers grew and grew, it was obvious we needed a second venue and therefore, a second person. So, I joined her and we worked out a good system and got about ½ the papers marked as well. We can get a little secretarial help with the “tick and flick” stuff, but my colleagues will have the most unpleasant task of grading the rest, in the middle of their own testing and marking times.

Whew! So much school stuff…it’s terrible. We’re really in the silly season here with tests, reports and lots of crazy parties coming up. There is a stack of people leaving and there is at least one party, usually two, to go to each weekend between now and the end of the year. I went out briefly on Friday evening for an informal get-together, but from now till June 6 we are fully booked…it’s quite a ridiculous social whirl! Chad’s sendoff is next Friday, followed by a great succession of shows, culminating in the Ross sendoff on June 3.

We ate a tasty lunch at a restaurant called “Spice Garden” on Saturday, in between proctoring and marking. It is advertised as having new Asian cuisine and it combined all sorts of foods, which one might not normally have together, but which were surprisingly tasty. How about Pannacotta with pureed pumpkin in the middle? Delicious!
Sunday saw our traditional long breakfast with proper coffee, raisin toast and Herald clippings (thanks Mum!), then a trip to the 7/11 to buy the paper to try to see if I could find the cinema website. We wanted to go to see Mission Impossible 3 and, knowing it would be packed, I wanted to book online and get our favourite seats. The site had disappeared! Turns out the cinema has been re-badged as “Miramar” and we looked up the new site, booked online and then were whisked to our favourite seats as usual. As Cass and I remarked to each other: “Surely, we won’t go backwards?!” referring to the tech help we are used to receiving from online booking et al. I mean seriously, having to buy a newspaper to find out when the movie is on…
We did go the movie and found it to be an excellent roller coaster of exciting action scenes and great hi tech gadgets. Lunch at one of our favourite Japanese curry houses, “Aubergine” was an entrée to home with the footy on the TV between Roosters and Bulldogs and online scores from Newcastle where the Knights seem to have sneaked over the line against Brisbane.

Surf is very flat, check pointyhat if you’re interested in the details: we’re getting a lot more comments lately which is quite entertaining and we’ve just passed our 1st anniversary. It is occasionally a bit of a pain to keep going, but takes very little time and is quite good fun. We’ve been going over a year now, which really spins me out…only seems like yesterday that we came up with the idea.No pictures today: that’s what happens when you’re locked inside all weekend! A “file” pic of the world’s tallest building: Taipei’s own 101 and the mighty Knights!